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Newbie; any and all help appreciated
My name is Charlie; I'm a pilot, and (hopeful) screenwriter.  I'm relatively technophobic so I may have troubles navigating the forum, but here goes.

Here's my logline; any comments/critiques would be greatly appreciated.

An underachieving engineer with an obsession for golf, and his nerdy lab assistant, struggle to create a remote-controlled golf ball , to take down their arch-nemesis and win a shot at the PGA Tour.  


Thanks in advance
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Hi Charlie! I  love the potential in your personal logline: "A technophobic pilot struggles to navigate ... "

The other logline sounds interesting too.

I have some questions for you ... which is the engineer's primary aim (PGA or bring down the nemesis)? ... what is the struggle with the ball and why is it interesting? ... "nerdy" is rather expected - anything else interesting about the sidekick? ... how does the underachievement connect to the nemesis - if at all?
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216 week(s) ago

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